I’ll start with the news.  I had my second annual review to discuss the progress I needed to make this summer.  I am pleased to say that I met the goals that I worked very hard to attain this summer and I am able to continue on.  This means I can finally look past my birthday in terms of things that I want to do, places I want to go, concerts I want to see, etc.  I have a lot of work to do, but I hope that I can meet the goals that I have and earn this PhD.


As far as half-marathon training, this was week 9.  I hadn’t written about the training before now, because honestly, I didn’t think I would get this far.  In fact, I haven’t even registered for the run.  I’m still that hesitant.

This week’s training was fine.  I had to cut a mile off my Tuesday run, because of my deadline, but the other two runs were fine.  I even was able to make it to Pilates on Wednesday, which was much needed.

Most of my issues are mental at this point.  It’s so hard to look at my times and see how far behind I am other runners my age.  I’m literally taking twice as long to complete runs as most other people and it’s so hard.  I know I’ve done this to myself, and I know it won’t change overnight, but I am very disappointed in myself, that I couldn’t follow through with the goals I set for myself that I hoped to achieve by my 40th birthday.  I’ll still be about 40 pounds more than I wanted for that, and it’s very discouraging.  No wonder I’m so slow!

It honestly makes me wonder if I should even bother doing the run.  I’m going to take a ridiculously long time and it’s going to be hard.  I keep saying after every long run, if it goes ok that I’ll register.  And I still haven’t the courage.  Next Sunday’s run is 9 miles, my longest run ever and it’s a bit daunting to be honest.

Hopefully by then I will have made a decision.


Here’s a picture of Bailey from earlier today.